I talked to my IF yesterday and they are having a reception to celebrate their wedding from January next Month. It's at my 21st week so they planned to have the genders sealed in an envelope and open it at the party with the whole family. It's such a neat idea!! Of course when we have our u/s I'll be able to identify the bits so I'll have to keep mum on the issue, I think since we say "twins" vs "he" or "she" since it's two I won't slip!

Also Geoff told me what names they'll have too so that's neat! We've got either:

Jason and Davis
Paige and Emma
Davis and Paige

It's a bit funny because one of my friends husbands name is Jason and her daughter is Emma. And another one of my friends has as on named Davis. They'll get a kick out of their name choices.

So the last 3 months have been BRUTAL! I think it's natures way of saying you are DONE! I don't think I'll ever want to be pregnant again after this one, which is the plan but I've said that before. LOL

I've been sick since about 6 weeks and just feeling weird. To be honest I think there is something going on with my BP. I even ended up in the hospital 3 weeks ago when I caught a bug that dropped my BP really low. I was nearly passing out. Ever since then I've felt off. Here's a picture of the adorable Get Well basket Zara(my first IM) sent me.




I have an OB appt next Friday and lunch with my IF's on Sunday so I'll be sure to ask about all that then.Other than that the babies are fine, I'm not feeling movement yet and I'm starting to feel a bit better. I wonder if I have an anterior placenta or two. I'm getting bigger every day now though and finally have a respectable belly picture to share.

Is 509 at 13dp3dt...for my history and compared to the beta charts this number definitely indicates more than one baby!

Tests from 7dp3dt but first positive was 6dp3dt!



This GS is pregnant again!!

about one of my next entries being pregnancy related?? Yeah well...LOL I really can't believe I've gone since March without spilling my news and NOW I'm in the 2ww again with a 2 embryo 3 day transfer for wonderful IF's in Chicago! We've had some MAJOR road bumps and it's taken us 10 months to get to transfer which considering I'm a 3rd timer, work for our agency AND we're using FCI again it shouldn't have taken more than a few months.

We had some disheartening donor issues. The first donor failed her screening so we were re-matched only to have our new donor hyper stimulate and have our transfer canceled a week prior. It was scary because we didn't know if we could use the same donor or if we'd have to start all over again. The clinic gave us the go ahead but during our 2nd cycle with her she hyper stimulated AGAIN and we had to trigger early.

By triggering early it caused only 9 of the 31 eggs to be mature and then only 2 fertilized. It was devestating! To add insult to injury for some reason this time around my lining was building up as quickly as it should and just a day before transfer it was only 6mm thick when it needed to be at least 7mm. I was convinced our transfer was doomed.

As a miracle my lining ended up being 8.5-9mm the morning of the transfer and our two lone embryos had made it to day 3 and as the RE put it "Are perfect" they were 8 cell grade 1 embryos, the best you can get. Our hope had been restored! So now I'm 4dp3dt and hope to hold out testing until Monday morning...no HPT's in the house thus far so I've been good.

From what I've talked about with IF's because of all the re-do's this is pretty much their only shot, never in a million years would I have thought that this match would be an all or nothing deal but I can understand why they feel this way after all this time, effort and financial burden. Since they will be able to legally marry in Massachusetts in a few months they can foster/adopt if this doesn't work but I having all my hope going that it will be successful for them.

After all of my best efforts to help a same sex couple become Dad's I really hope this one is it!!

Well no new ED matches in the works, I just may have something exciting planned soon but I'm not giving details just yet! LOL I've been super busy doing more work for FSC and also going to school Full Time at WMU. I decided to transfer for my BA and have been taking 4-5 classes per semester. I still have Jamison home with me and now it's summer Ashton too PLUS my friends 11 month old infant. Yes, I'm crazy I know!!

An update on M and A, they found a new ED and went through the whole cycle and got to transfer day just to find out at the very last second that Jessica actually ended up with scar tissue from her D & C from her miscarriage. Talk about heart breaking! So they've had to start over again and find a new SM, last I knew they were searching for someone to do a FET with. I feel so horrible about everything! I've probably given up on the ED dream indefinitely, I've had more disappointments that success with this process. I've done ok with my donations but the relationships that have dwindled away are saddening.

Attention Illinois Surrogate Mothers! We need you!!! Zara's agency has a waiting list of IP's who would like an IL GS and we are in need of new candidates. If you're interested please email me at alicia@familysourcesurrogcy.com

Of course anyone who lives in the Midwest area please feel free to contact me too as we do match through out the Midwest, it's just we have a really high demand for IL surrogates right now.

I turned 29 this week, it was 6 years ago this month that I first typed "surrogate mother" into Yahoo search and started my path to helping create happiness. As a surrogate mother I've helped bring 3 children into this world and as a donor I know for certain at least one family has a baby and I'm lead to believe that there are at least 2 more babies as well.

It such a blessing to be involved in this amazing process. It's addiciting but I understand why. It's a permenant warm fuzzy for us. Every time we see pictures of the families we help create or here about how happy Mom and Dad are with their children it warms my heart and makes everything I've gone through completely worth it.

Someone wrote this amazing poem and shared it with all of us Surrogates, it rings so true. For those who ask how can you do that? Isn't it hard to be a surrogate? No, I can say for certain it is not, it's one of the most important, amazing, life changing things I've ever done and I am forever grateful to be able to have these experiences.

Our friendship started differently
than most friendships I've had.
We had to search each other out
because of something sad.

A precious child to fill your hearts
is what you're longing for.
Infertility has made it hard
to open up that door.

And so a search began for you
to find a helping heart.
So similar to my own search
not knowing where to start.

For me the search is special
it requires such great care.
A couple to help have a child...
the fruit my search must bare.

Now we've found each other
so much more real it seems.
Through faith and hope and honesty
we're moving toward your dream.

But the dream we have,
it is the same,
a dream that's filled with firsts.
First smiles, first laughs, first steps, first words....
all starting with a birth.

Often times I find myself
wondering what it's like
to have to trust a stranger
with such a precious life.

And though I can't imagine
all that you've been through,
I've been so blessed in my life
I'm drawn to helping you.
And I hope you know I'll do my best
to bring a child to you.

Some people call us Angels
us surro-moms to be.
But I don't feel Angelic,
I just feel like me.

Our journey is just starting,
and no one knows the end.
I pray it brings to you a child
and brings to me a friend.

Well I guess I shouldn't update my blog until I'm cycling because each time I do it falls threw. This time I suppose it can be my fault. My former ED IM wanted a two for one cycle arrangement and I just couldn't make it work for me. It seemed like an over commitment and although I did my best to compromise it just wasn't want my IM wanted so we parted ways. I took down my ad this time. I think I'm done at 5, I don't know.

I have a few other things going on in my life that make sense to put first and I guess I'll have to just wait and see if my future brings one final donation that ends well. It probably won't be until later next year, I'll be 30 then too...since I just turned 29 today so I'm doubtful I'll match. I suppose I could just update my status as "Retired Egg Donor" BUT I am a women and women are fickle.

For the last two years I've said I was done being pregnant and I didn't want to go through a pregnancy again but here I am still not ready to officially retire. I just never know, and I'd hate to eat my words! LOL Although I said I'm done I didn't really cherish my last pregnancy as my last and mentally I don't have that closure. Don't be surprised if my next update is something pregnancy related ;)

But in the meantime here are some pictures from my visit to see Zara and family. Bella and Noah are going to be 5 years old in a few months, they are so grown! And too sweet!







Unfortunately no new pictures of Ben yet. His 2nd birthday is coming up in May and Jess said we need to get together to celebrate. I hope to see them soon. It does stink a bit to only see them once a year but at least I have that:)